Wednesday, April 29, 2009


I had an experience today that reminded me of why I will NEVER be Mother of the Year. Nothing profound, mind you...just a typical day in my life. I will preface it by saying that I hate school photos. I think they look cheesy and boring and every time they come up, I think of all the reasons why I do not want to succumb to the pressure of ordering them. However, every time I still order them. Something inside me says that to be a good mother, you have to order school my kid would be the only one in the class without the $90 check in the envelope while every other has the top of the line package marked on their envelopes. (I only imagine this but don't really have any idea what other mom's order) I don't think it's the money that bothers me because generally speaking, I am not a cheap person. I hate scrap booking and I don't have one of those frames that contains the mat with cutouts of each grade's picture. These pictures are stashed in a rubbermaid container that I will someday organize. I would just rather have a beautiful photo than a school photo. In the end, I always mark the cheapest package just to satisfy my own ego or my child's or both.

For a week, I have known that Fisher's preschool is taking their SECOND picture set of the year....BUGS!!! Anyway, he was supposed to wear his purple preschool t-shirt so they all look the same. He only wears this shirt when it is mandatory which means it has been worn maybe 3 times. The teacher kept reminding us to have our freshly laundered t-shirts ready for picture day:) Preschool starts at 9 a.m. and we live right around the corner from the building. I am not typically one to procrastinate things. At 8:55, I went to get Fisher's preschool shirt from his drawer. I found it crumpled in a ball in his drawer and got a little worried. I thought I'd be a good mom and iron it so that he would be in top form for this ever-so-important photo.

First, I noticed that it was covered with dried food...sauces, etc. I got a wash cloth to erase all of these since there was NO time to launder it. Next, I ran the iron across it forgetting that the print on the front is not meant for high heat so the iron dragged the white lines of the graphics across his shirt...permanently ruined! After picking up the iron, I noticed a stench coming from the shirt. I thought it must be the burning smell of graphics but oddly enough, it smelled like urine. After being disgusted, I remembered when Fisher wore this shirt last....a few weeks ago to a PETTING ZOO! It had food, goat, pony, deer, pig and chicken smell and whatever else he hugged all over it and to top that off, he had an accident in the bathroom that left urine on his shorts and the bottom of his shirt (too anxious to get the pants all the way down.) I burst out into laughter because could a shirt really have anything worse or more smelly on it? Maybe dried blood or something.

In the end, I had no recourse but to spray Kevin's cologne on it and send him to preschool for the coveted school photos that will sit under my bed in a rubbermaid container.


Mandy April 29, 2009 at 12:33 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mandy April 29, 2009 at 12:36 PM  

Sorry about the first post.
Chelsea, I love it! Nobody could have worded that better.
I love that you sent him in his shirt anyway, for that reason alone I would give you M.O.T.Y.. You definitely have my vote!

youreprettytoo April 29, 2009 at 5:45 PM  

Great post. That sounds like something I would do too! I was so hoping there would be a picture of the shirt. So when you get the preschool photos back, be sure toscan them in and post it for us! And we definitely need to get together when you come in July!

Nancy fancy pants May 1, 2009 at 7:53 PM  

That is freak'n funny!

megan May 3, 2009 at 7:29 PM  

Oh my gosh! I laughed sooo hard. That is totally sick that you sprayed it with cologne. Good times.

marisa May 3, 2009 at 9:17 PM  

It could have been worse, it could have had poo on it. I'm so glad to hear that things like that happen to other people.

The Arntsens May 4, 2009 at 12:38 AM  


That post sounded like half of my junior and senior years at Kingwood High! The only diff was I had to wrestle with Dooleeka to yank a pair of dank jeans out from under her and her latest brood of puppies...perhaps this is why I never had a date! Long live spray-on BRUT!

Julie May 29, 2009 at 1:33 AM  

That is so disusting and extremely funny! I am so happy I am not the only one that has days like that. I also want to see a pic of the shirt and I want to get together in July too!!

One Big Happy Family May 30, 2009 at 2:08 AM  

Ha! Ha! Ha! Your story sounds like some I've been through - loved reading it!! XOXOXOXO

Ryan and Elaine Pettit July 30, 2009 at 11:03 PM  

Hahahahaha That is too funny!!! I love your blog Chelsey